Where the fuck am I?!?!?!

"I wanna breath the air I did before." thats so damn true. Where the fuck is Dinu that ive known for all my life? Now more and more people tell me ive changed, and im bad now, and im disrespectful, see even now writing this shit down I feel like cussin everyone the fuck out. It is, maybe the change after the states, or maybe the change after some love :))) lol or maybe it isjust that im a lil bit lost. See, even if many of yall say that im selfish nd all that, I know when I get lost and I know when i act wrong, however, I need smthg to change it back, to become the easy going dude with funny jokes rather than too offensive ones. But as much as jokes are offense towards some people, they are devensive towards myself, just closing my eyes at everything, and living on that wave. That aint right, I know, but thats easy, fuckkkkk, I just didnt even notice how I said the words that drove me insane at some point "thats easier."  I know I always used to look around for the best ways for me, but I never..well I did look for easy ways, and when one time, once in long fuckin time I wanted the hard way, the complicated and long way, some1 else wanted the damn easy way. But see, dude why am I such a cry baby?! well, damn it, I just want things to be right, I want to be the man I used to be, cuz I know I can be nice, and cool and funny, and respectful and elegant, and all that...
Dude fuck that, I can and I am nice with the people that r nice to me. I dont have nothing to prove to nobody, even tho, i would love to feel the way i felt, and to breath the air I used to, as the song says. Maybe, something will change.